Ain't Misbehavin' Read online

  “Stop now,” Alf growled in a warning to his brother.

  “Can’t.” Clark managed and then tried to press his lips together to stop the chuckles escaping. His eyes were still tearing, and his chest was still heaving.

  “I will hurt you.” Alf snapped back.

  “You could rip off my head and toss it on the floor at your damn feet, but it’s still going to be laughing up at you,” Clark managed between spluttered sobs and chuckles.

  “Let me go,” Harper bit out, and brought the alpha’s attention, and those sexy-as-hell jet black eyes back on her. “I won’t be so bloody gentle the next time…”

  “Gentle…” Clark roared with laughter again.

  “It’s not damn funny,” Alf berated his brother then snapped his attention back to the witch in his arms. “As for you – I do not appreciate being this damn close to you, but until my muscles unlock, we’re stuck like glue.”

  “Stuck on you?” Joy said, frowning. “Isn’t that a song?”

  “Glue!” Harper hissed back over her shoulder.

  “Oh, and there’s me thinking he was being all romantic, like a mate,” she teased.

  Joy liked to stick the knife in, rub salt in the wounds when her friend was wrong about things – mainly because it didn’t happen that much and she had to get the gloating in where she could.

  She’d let out a big breath the moment that the shifter had said he was there to find the blogger because that meant that she hadn’t stirred up fate to find her a mate. She wasn’t entirely sure that she was happy to know that there wasn’t a true soul mate out there for her, but, she guessed she could live with it.

  “Mate!” The alpha growled and narrowed his eyes on the curvy witch in his arms.

  “Not right now, thanks, but she might be up for it,” Harper shot back, and hooked a thumb back over her shoulder to where Joy was standing.

  There was one almighty growl that rumbled through the room, and someone wasn’t laughing anymore.

  In fact, nobody was laughing anymore.

  CHAPTER SIX

  ~

  Clark slapped both hands over his mouth and glared at the witch to his right. It was true that he hadn’t really paid her much attention up until that point, what with his brother being attacked and all, but he had noted her generous curves, and the sound of her voice had given him a few goosebumps too many.

  But then the other witch had zapped his brother, and all hell had broken loose, and he’d been laughing so damn hard that he’d … sucked in a breath or two up his damn, stupid nose.

  “Clark…?” Alf left it there. His brother’s eyes snapped towards him for only a second before they went right back to the witch. “You’re freaking me out a little here, brother.”

  “I’m freaking you out?” Clark muttered from behind his hands.

  He didn’t want to speak. He didn’t want to think. He certainly didn’t want to sniff, and if he kept everything silent and calm then his wolf might just…

  Mine…

  “Oh crap!” he dropped his hands as his eyes went wider still, and he swallowed down his sandpaper tongue.

  “Clark?”

  Clark pressed his lips together and quickly shook his head.

  Mine…

  “Brother?”

  The beta shook his head again, faster that time. He muttered something against his white lips that were still pressed firmly shut.

  “That’s not good, right?” Harper asked, as she placed her palms against the alpha’s chest and pushed – it didn’t help her any, she was still locked against him.

  “Not good – right,” Alf growled back.

  “When you say, not good,” Joy said, and Clark’s eyes snapped in her direction. She scowled at him for a long moment. “I have to wonder, for who is it not good?”

  “It’s whom,” Harper corrected her, and Joy’s head snapped around like she’d been zapped. Her eyes narrowed, and Harper knew that she was winding up to it.

  “You’re correcting my grammar now?” She started slowly. “Now, when one of us could possibly be in the worst case of doggy doodie of their damn lives – now?” She got a little faster, a lot more shrill-like. “Are you insane?” she hissed, looking like the epitome of the mad scientist.

  “Yes,” Harper offered back with a little smile. Then she thought about it for a moment. “Wait – no,” she shrugged. “Or, maybe. Can I get back to you on that?”

  “No! You can’t get back to…” Joy bit off her rant on a grumble of something under her breath. “You know what – sure, you can get back to me on that. Once we sort out this absolute bloody catastrophe.” She shoved her hands out and motioned towards Clark.

  The beta scowled at her as if she’d just thrown up on his shoes.

  “Absolute bloody catastrophy?” Clark repeated her words back to her. Then he grunted. “Gee – that makes me feel so good about myself I’ll just go throw myself under a bus now, shall I?”

  “Doors right there,” Joy motioned towards it, and the beta drew his head back on his neck and shot her a look of disbelief.

  “You’re not a very nice person,” he growled.

  “She’s a witch, what did you expect?” Alf growled.

  “Hey!” Harper snapped.

  “Oh, please – say it ain’t so,” Alf snorted.

  “How’d you like me to kick you in the balls so hard you’ll think you swallowed a furball?” Harper tried to growl, but she didn’t think she’d managed it until he growled back.

  She kind of hoped that she hadn’t offered up any kind of a challenge to him or his beast. He still had those big, thick, muscled arms around her body and getting away would be a problem for her.

  “I rest my case,” Alf growled.

  “I’ll rest my foot up your backside in a minute,” Harper grumbled.

  “Bonus, case resting,” Alf growled.

  “Hello!” Joy bit out as she waved her arms to draw Harper’s attention back to her.

  “I’m a little busy with Sir. Growls-a-lot, right now…” Harper started, but the sound of a shrill squeal from her friend made her sigh. She eyed the alpha for a moment. “To be continued.” She said, giving him a sneer before she turned back to Joy. “Go right ahead.”

  “Err, him!” Joy made the double hand motion to the beta who was growling again. This time with annoyance.

  “He’s all yours,” Harper grinned.

  “Or is he?” Joy cocked an eyebrow at her and Harper frowned.

  “Isn’t he?” She was scowling by the time that she turned her steely gaze onto the beta.

  Clark groaned.

  He didn’t want to have this conversation because then it would be real.

  He didn’t want to stake his claim because then there would be no coming back from that one.

  He didn’t want to start the damn ball rolling and admit that he had a witch mate because his brother wasn’t going to never let that one go – let alone his other brother – his pack – or, the damn vampire.

  He was toast.

  Burnt toast.

  Burnt toast that had landed butter side down on the dirt floor where the five-second rule didn’t apply.

  Mine…

  He groaned once more. It sucked to be him.

  “Oh, Brother!” Alf growled, and his eyes practically rolled back in his head.

  “This is not my fault,” Clark bit out as he pointed a finger up at the ceiling. “You just had to come here, tracking down the blog lady…”

  “That reminds me,” Alf growled as he turned his glare on the witch in his arms.

  “Now?” Harper tried to mirror Joy’s reactions from moments earlier. “You want to ignore your brother’s plight and nit-pick over a few words on a computer screen, now?”

  “Don’t even try to worm out of this,” Alf growled.

  “Look,” Joy bit out in annoyance. “If one of us is a mate, then I demand to know that it’s her!” She pointed at Harper.

  “Me?” Harper hissed.

&nb
sp; “Wouldn’t that be ironic?” Joy snorted a chuckle that sounded dastardly to Harper’s ears.

  “Can we go home now?” Clark said, sounding more like a pup that was tired and ready for his bed than a grown ass beta.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  ~

  “Somebody needs to clean up their mess first, don’t you think?”

  Alf had heard that whine in his brother’s voice to. It reminded him of his childhood. He gave a low, deep chuckle that rumbled through his chest, and Harper’s breasts.

  “Can you not?” She almost groaned at the feel of the vibration against her traitorous, hard nipples.

  She was lying to herself if she thought they were all perky because she was cold. He was hot – in more ways than one.

  “Can I not what?” Alf scowled down his nose at her.

  “Basically, everything, but the growling is particularly annoying,” she bit out.

  “Well, so is getting zapped. Suck it up,” he grumbled back.

  “Can they go home now?” Joy demanded, and Harper snorted a chuckle.

  “From your lips to the Goddess’ ears,” she huffed. “How are you not limp yet?” She demanded turning her attention back to the alpha, and he cocked an eyebrow back at her.

  “You might want to rephrase that one, sweetheart,” Alf offered with the first real sign of a smile on his lips that he’d offered her. It was crooked and smirk-ish, and it annoyed her right down to the bone.

  “Oh, bite me, woofty,” she muttered.

  “You might what to reconsider that one as well,” Alf growled.

  His beast certainly pricked up his ears at her words, and the wolf clawed a little within him to try to get him to take her scent. Alf didn’t like that idea much, not after what happened to Clark.

  What were the odds? His brother and him finding their fated mates on the same day, in the same place – he guessed they would be astronomical. But he still wasn’t taking the damn chance. The lottery had bad odds as well, that didn’t mean that people didn’t win.

  Not that he considered a witch as a mate a win, and if that witch in question was his blogger, then he doubted he’d need to worry long because he was going to wring her little witch neck – unless she turned out to be his brother’s mate – the sheer happiness of his brother’s eternal suffer ing at the hands of his mate would just be too funny.

  “Don’t you have anything better to do than stalk witches?” Harper sneered up at him. “Maybe visit a store and buy mouthwash? We can only hope.”

  “I’m really not appreciating your damn attitude…”

  “Snap!” She bit back.

  “If it wasn’t for your poison pen all over that stupid site…”

  “You deserved it. That box was defective!” she snapped back, and the moment that a low, angry growl rumbled through his chest, she snapped to attention, knowing she’d said too much.

  “It is you…” Alf growled.

  “I’m me, and you’re you, and they’re mates!” she exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger at Clark in the hope of deflecting the alpha’s attention away from the blog.

  “Don’t say it out loud!” Clark growled and tossed his hands up in the air with a roll of his eyes.

  Mine…

  “Why? Does the bogeyman appear if you do?” Harper tossed back.

  “Me and…” Joy offered him a sideways glare, but when he looked at her, she snapped her head around in the opposite direction.

  “You did tempt fate,” Harper sighed, reminding her with a gleeful look in her eyes that she’d been right after all.

  “And you had to write that stupid blog review of his box!” Joy tossed up a hand.

  “Oh, please, deny it again,” the alpha growled with something that looked a lot like murderous glee in his eyes. He’d found his man-woman, he’d known he would.

  “I don’t think people say this to you enough, so – mouthwash,” Harper hissed.

  “Witch,” Alf growled and snapped his arms from around her. Harper jumped back away from him.

  “Oh, thank the Goddess,” she sighed. “And while you’re at it – deodorant is not a bad word.”

  “Be thankful that this one isn’t your mate, brother, because I’m going to kill her,” the alpha growled.

  ~

  ~

  ~

  “Harper, come out of there,” Joy demanded with something of a hiss in her voice that carried through the wooden barrier and into the darkness of the closet.

  Harper wasn’t taking any chances. The alpha had announced that he was going to kill her and he looked pretty convincing. She nudged a broom that was digging into her back and bit out a curse.

  Thinking back on that moment and her split-second decision, it might have been a mistake to kick him in the balls, but she wasn’t going to regret anything. At least, not until the alpha had his hands around her neck trying to end her days, then all bets were off.

  It was true that she’d made a beeline for the closet as he’d gone down like a sack of bricks. It was also true that she’d left Joy on the outside of that door, which was now spelled shut, but her friend was a mate and in no danger whatsoever from those two goons.

  However, it didn’t take a genius to work out that if the alpha wanted to kill her before — then it probably went double-down now.

  “Hey, he threatened to kill me — I’m staying put,” Harper grumbled.

  “He’s not going to…”

  “When I get my hands on you…” The alpha growled through the searing hot pain in his balls, and the sick feeling in his gut.

  “See!” Harper lifted her hand and motioned at the door, even though her friend was on the other side and couldn’t actually see a thing.

  “He’s just a little miffed right now, and who wouldn’t be?” Joy tossed back. “I mean, his balls, really?” She berated her.

  “I was only protecting myself,” Harper said, and she lifted her chin, and folded her arms in a show of defiance that her friend couldn’t see either, but it made her feel better.

  “Boy, are you going to need to protect yourself?” Alf growled.

  “Oh, don’t you worry about that. I will,” she tossed back.

  That stupid and needless guilt gene within her had been tapping away at the back of her mind — now — not so much.

  “Can we be civilized about this?” Joy asked.

  “Civilised? He’s a shifter — enough said,” Harper tossed back.

  “She kicked me in the balls, how is that civilized?” Alf growled as he looked at his brother to back him up.

  “Admittedly, it was probably the wrong thing to do…” Clarke said.

  “Probably? Whose side are you on?” The alpha growled at his sibling. So much for male unity, brothers, the packing sticking together. Balls were balls, and they should have been off limits at all times.

  “Well, you did threaten to kill the witch,” Clark reasoned.

  “And with good cause…” Alf growled.

  “I’m sure she didn’t see it that way,” Clark shrugged.

  “So, you are on her side,” Alf growled and gave a long, hard grunt as he pushed up from the floor with all of his might, trying to ignore the searing pain that still existed in his balls and his weak legs that didn’t much feel like holding up his weight.

  “In truth, I don’t think there are any sides in this one. There’s no black and white, just grey — lots and lots of grey,” Clark grumbled.

  His beast was still clawing within him in a determined effort to claim their mate. He had more to worry about than his brother’s balls or is pride.

  Mine…

  Clark just wished that his wolf would shut up about it and give him a moment's peace.

  Mine…

  It didn’t look like it was going to happen anytime soon.

  “Let me at that,” the alpha growled.

  He took a step and groaned as the pain shot from his groin into his stomach and a new wave of nausea rose within him again. He wasn’t going to let th
at stop him from getting to the witch. He’d found his culprit, and he was going to dish out her punishment.

  “See! The man is like a dog with a bone,” Harper called from behind the closed door.

  “That’s not helpful,” Joy grumbled.

  “Neither is being eaten by a wolf,” Harper called back.

  “I’m not going to eat you — I’m guessing you’re not that tasty — probably more bitter than a lemon if what you write on your blog is anything to go by,” Alf growled.

  “See, he’s not going to eat you,” Joy offered.

  “But I am going to chew you up and spit you out,” Alf growled, taking one more step and grunting in pain.

  “Like you’ll get the chance,” Harper sneered back.

  “Out of my way, witch mate,” Alf growled, taking one more step and finding that the pain was easing.

  “That’s not a good idea,” Joy said with a small shake of her head. The alpha wasn’t listening.

  “Trust me, when I get my hands on you…” Alf reached for the handle of the door, and the moment that he wrapped his fingers around the metal — a screaming, white-hot, burning pain seared through his hand, up his arm, and continued through every part of his body.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  ~

  “Does he never listen?” Joy asked as she rushed to sidestep the alpha when the man’s legs gave way, and he crashed to the floor once more.

  “Not often, no,” Clark chuckled.

  “Pride before the fall,” Joy sighed.

  “Tell me it was a good one,” Harper called from behind the door with a little snigger to boot.

  “Oh, it was a good one,” Joy offered back berating her friend with her tone before she sighed again.

  “Serves him right, threatening a woman,” Harper sneered.

  “Not a woman, a witch,” Alf growled as he pushed up to his hands and knees, and shook the pain from his body.